Why did I leave the East. Why did I leave school. Why did I deviate from my nice neat career trajectory. Why did I ruin my vocal chords. Why did I quit playing instruments. Why did I gain back that weight that I lost. Why did I stop dressing awesome. Why did I not just date one of those guys. Why did I lose my ipod chord. Why did I switch phones. Why did I leave my cat behind. Why did I switch majors. Why did I procrastinate so much. Why did I cut my hair. Why did I quit doing activism things. Why did I sleep so much. Why did I spend all my money. Why didn’t I read more books. Why didn’t I exercise more. Why didn’t I volunteer more. Why didn’t I go to more shows. Why didn’t I get more involved. Why didn’t I write more. Why didn’t I sing more. Why didn’t I see my friends more. Why didn’t I see my family more. Why didn’t I love more. Why am I not more ?
Why does my bedroom look nothing like this? It’s basically just a bunch of shit on a floor.
Kristen Stewart, Emma Watson & Jennifer Lawrence @ Soho Party (8.09)
From a distance, the three young women chatting away in the corner of the private Soho House club in Toronto seem like old friends sharing a late night cocktail. But zoom in closer and you soon realise the trio are stars of movie franchises that have garnered more than £4billion at the global box-office, and that’s probably an under-estimate. Jennifer Lawrence, Kristen Stewart and Emma Watson, all 22, are three of the most powerful actresses in Hollywood and if nothing else their friendly repartee dispelled idle rumours that they must be bitter rivals. ‘They’re just three girls having a quiet chat after a long day and an even longer night working ‘, noted Nick Jones, the founder of the Soho House group.
All I can think right now is “these women are one year older than you, and they have accomplished more than you every will”.
I want pretty things again
So I need to call Shoppers back and like go meet this neat girl about this awesome room that I want to rent but I just can’t get myself to do it. Also I want to go to the couchsurfing meetup but my own weird apathy is preventing me.
I think I work things up in my head too much and then actually doing them gets scary. I’m fine with people but sometimes I get too afraid.
Also being at my sister’s puts me into a weird funk.
That’s a lie, being anywhere puts me into a weird funk.
I just need more movement and good food but I can’t afford either so I feel weird.
We all have to try, but sometimes I just don’t feel like it.
Julie Dorion - Cars & Trucks
I also owe money.
But I have three job interviews over the next two days, so I should be able to get a job and hopefully pay it all back soon enough.
I also recently sent a message to this girl on Couchsurfing who is renting out rooms in her house off Whyte ave (aka the best part of the city) for not too pricey. I`d like to live there and not have to deal with my sister constantly.
I just want to get on with my life and live it real.
omg such a good movie